I am finishing my ink and kerosene, so this letters going to be short. I’ve drunk too much tonight and there’s a headache coming, the dog keeps barking to irritate me. God bless me can finish this and throw myself in bed.
I’ve heard about the theater affair you’ve mentioned in your letter. Well Leon was asking for that retribution. I wasn’t surprised at all about that blaze in midnight. It was all his fault to pay me the fucking 50 pounds less for my last script. I doubted, for sure, that his theatre would definitely be set on fire one day by somebody (could be me) if not now. His ability to put himself under hostility is just amazing. Well I can sell my transcript to Atlas so no need to worry (though we are a bit awkward).
Awful weather is still going on. Comparing to your tiny garden far from the madding crowd, the environment in London is just unbearably disgusting. I got tons of unknown black powder in my naval and oral cavity just after a night walk. If my lungs are dug out one day it’s for sure to see some black, wrinkled human tissue, smoking just makes it worse.
I received the invitation for next week’s writers’ party that you’ve told me before. Are you sure you would like to go? They are just the madding crowd from whom you’d better keep far away. The only topic will be how to put some erotic stuff in their writings to make a big sale. Will you, sit between two men arguing whether a quadralove is better than a pentalove? Their sputum is going to split on your hair and suits to make you sticky, then if you go out after that to dip on some dust, your shiny-white soft hair will turn to be black as mine.
Therefore my suggestion is: stay where you are, keep your peaceful life with your gardening. Keep doing a milk bath once a day, keep your pencil-friendly tone.
That’s all I could say, now I have to throw myself in bed. I spilt some coffee on this piece of paper. I will send it to you if it is still readable after I get up tomorrow.
Dear Mr Kougami
To be honest, I don’t think this letter is “readable” anymore. I tried my best to identify the words that you have written. What’s more, your hand shivering after drunk, the writing crooked a lot. Feel like I have unravelled a military cipher text. I really hope you can make communication as a more important thing.
It’s not hard to imagine your situation following your description, probably not not so much difference comparing to four months before isn’t it? We had a walk on the street at that time when we bought some clothes and a cane. On the train back in the evening I coughed hell of a lot and fell asleep two hours later than usual. I finally set my nerve at rest after I had a appointment with my doctor. It couldn’t be a clever choice to stick there for you. I do think you’d better move away as quickly as possible from that industrial city full of soot and smog, I will try to get you a new place to live in France. Do you speak Italian? I can find some place around there as well. You will only need to go back to London when you have to sell your transcript and keep yourself far away from that place for the rest of the time.
Well, that businessman called Atlas is a pretty good one, though I don’t like his most famous actor. I have seen him swearing an awful lot about the poem in the lines at a pub. I couldn’t remember which bit exactly but possibly this part of Byron:
When the web that we weave is complete,
And the shuttle exchanged for the sword,
We will fling the winding sheet
O'er the despot at our feet,
And dye it deep in the gore he has pour'd.
The actor swore at the poet while he was drinking. It was such a situation that I never would like to recall again. After I had a friendly discussion with him, his facial expression seemed like that he would never like to meet me for the rest of his life. Anyway, I don’t have a transcript to sell so that won’t bother me very much. At most it means I have to take care not to sit at the front when I see his play in London. Otherwise I am not sure if he will rush towards me directly from the stage with a sword in his hand.
I haven't been contacted with Leon before. I’ve just heard something probably not true about him. Well the thing that you told me sounds similar to what I’ve heard from others, so it’s better for me to save my words on that. You’d better not laugh at him too much, fifty pounds are not such a large amount of money. Do you still remember for the first time we meet in Manchester when we were both students, we spent more than nine hundred pounds during the first three months? I couldn’t remember how we spent those lot. During the next two years I didn’t buy a single luxury thing. I nearly tried to trace back every moment we were together with a lawyer professional at bankrupting cases.
I am actually pleased to realized that we both know what a difficult life we are leading. We learned how to take two buns to the seaside to give ourselves some kind of free romance of poverty. Well you could say it’s romance of poets if you would stick to that.
Now I am living happily with my gardening, and everything seems to be going as well as it should be. The only problem is that I am quite boring sometimes. There is no interesting conversation at all. My housekeeper and my neighbors had hardly read any books, the only thing we can talk about is the rainy weather and the time it went dark. Can you imagine that? Last time I asked my housekeeper what the cloud looked like, he said it was a cotton blanket. Jesus Christ! What if he said a crowd of little sheep! I could do nothing other than doing some sun bath, reading a few pages and doing some novel writing or replying letters. Although my progress in this novel increased a lot because of this, the fact that I am lacking communication depressed me a lot. To be honest, the thing that I enjoy most is to chat with others after supper somewhere on the street during a wondering around. That’s what I did in Paris. After that, however, I suddenly have to wear properly to put myself into some of those upper class social affairs. I certainly know how to be a fence rider as a public speaker, and that’s why I moved away from that environment.
But now I am even missing the busy time like that. It’s such a crazy idea, just like putting on the clothes that were popular when I was a child, regarding them as classical style. I get access to the news in Europe via letters, the postman sometimes answers my questions as well, so I can say I am still within this society in some way. I think I might go back to the cities one day, but it’s better to avoid those pointless socialization. Would it help if I said I am physically not very well? Though I am much healthier than most of the people, especially you.
That’s why I am going to that party, to enrich my demand of socialization. Although I have no idea whether it’s better to fall in love with three or four, at least I can say something about love of one person or two. Furthermore I’ve heard that one of the writer will criticize the reference of his story by another writer, both of them brought somebody with them, which sounds lovely, at least worth to see. I am not worry about sitting between two strange guys, as long as you sit next to me. If I jump onto to the table to read out some work by Swift in a sudden, don’t forget to take away my pistol attached on my belt at back ASAP.
A bottle of ink was sent together with this letter, hope it will arrive safely.
I am considering to move away indeed, but not outside of England, I will find somewhere myself.
To prevent another tragedy happens beforehand, I’ve prepared several nine hundred pounds for us to squander for a while, as far as you are not going to walk into a book store, wave your hand and ask for all of them.
The ink arrived as a full. Let’s finish our conversation when we meet.